


And I Can't Change

by a_grand_dame_of_moscow



Category: Natasha Pierre and the Great Comet of 1812 - Malloy, War and Peace - Fandom
Genre: Affection, Also Helene lowkey has seperation anxiety, Coming Out, Crappy title sorry, F/F, Fluff, Helene has a thing for pet names, I ship these two SO HARD, Nonbinary Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-25
Updated: 2017-10-25
Packaged: 2019-01-22 17:03:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12486532
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/a_grand_dame_of_moscow/pseuds/a_grand_dame_of_moscow
Summary: Marya confesses something to Helene late one evening, in regards to gender.(There is not a lot of Marlene content, so my goal is to fill up this entire relationship tag with my pointless AU's)





	And I Can't Change

Helene woke up, slowly, confused as to why she didn’t feel her lover’s warmth next to her. She grasped the sheets on Marya’s side of the bed, and sat up, at the feeling of no one there. The countess started to breathe heavily, as an overwhelming anxiety hit her.

Helene threw a nightgown that had been discarded on the floor over her, and ran through the house, desperate to find Marya. She saw a small patch of light coming through the door of the bathroom. She threw the door open, with more force than necessary (although, at the time, it seemed perfectly understandable to Helene). The opening of the door revealed Marya in the bathtub, who looked quite exquisite to Helene in this state. Marya’s hair was thrown up messily, and candlelight accentuated the strong features of the dame’s face.

“Lelya!” Marya cried, startled, as Helene closed the bathroom door. “You cannot barge in like that in the dead of night! You scared me half to death.”

Helene crouched down by the side of the tub, removing her nightgown, and letting it fall to the floor. “I’m sorry, darling,” Helene said, kissing Marya’s hand. “But, you gave me quite the fright as well, angel. It scares me when I wake up and you aren’t laying there next to me. What are you doing take a bath so late into the night?”

Marya shrugged. “Needed to clear my head; do some thinking. I’m sorry I worried you.”

“It’s quite all right,” Helene said, running her hand up Marya’s arm reassuringly. “Mind if I join you?” 

Marya nodded, and Helene got in the tub. Helene was surprised to find that they could both fit so comfortably. She wrapped her arms around Marya and began to plant light kisses on her lover’s neck and shoulder. The redhead’s eyes fluttered shut, and Marya’s head tilted to the side to give Helene more access to the pale skin.

“What’s got you so worried, my darling?” Helene’s warm breath caressed Marya’s ear as she spoke. “You’re never awake at this hour unless something is bothering you.”

Marya took a deep breath and quietly began to speak. “Do you ever feel…out of place? As though, you don’t belong to any specific category?”

Confusion washed over Helene’s face. “What do you mean, my dear, Masha?”

“I…I feel like I don’t have a gender. I know that biologically I do, but mentally…” Marya shook their head. “No, forget it. It’s nonsense…”

Helene put her hand under Marya’s chin, forcing her lover to stop shaking their head, and look at her. “It’s not nonsense. If that’s how you feel, that’s how you feel. You can’t control that, dear.” 

“Are you sure you don’t think I’m crazy?” Marya said, with a slight laugh.

“I would never think anything of the sort,” Helene said, kissing Marya’s forehead. “Now, just let me know what pronouns you want for me to use, ma enchanteur.” 

Marya’s eyes became bright because they knew Helene accepted them. “For now, I guess just they/them. Something neutral.” 

“Then, that’s how I shall refer to you from now on.” Helene lightly kissed Marya, who deepened the kiss, tangling their fingers in Helene’s wild curls. 

The couple stayed in the bath for a long time, until the water became cold and their fingers started to prune. They dried off, and walked back to their bedchambers, hands clasped together in a sign of overwhelming affection. The lovers got back under the bedsheets and quickly became entangled in each other’s arms.

“I love you, my darling,” Helene whispered as she kissed Marya’s shoulder. 

Marya smiled, as a warm feeling of acceptance rushed over them. “I love you, too.” They said, before drifting off to sleep, nestled comfortably against their lover’s body.


End file.
